Do American ESL Teachers get actual friends in Japan?
tokyo_michigan asked:
I have heard of the term “Japanese Friendship” for guys, compared to “North American” Friendship. I’d like to know if I were to be an ESL teacher in Japan, if I would be able to get an actual friend, not just someone who would hang out with me (after ESL, after work, or on the weekends, etc.), just so they could learn better English, but an actual friend.
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I have heard of the term “Japanese Friendship” for guys, compared to “North American” Friendship. I’d like to know if I were to be an ESL teacher in Japan, if I would be able to get an actual friend, not just someone who would hang out with me (after ESL, after work, or on the weekends, etc.), just so they could learn better English, but an actual friend.
Please Help! Any negative answers will be deleted.
April 8th, 2009 at 5:22 pm
I made no friends in Japan.
I made houndreds of friends in China.
Japan is not gaijin-friendly and very very lonely. China is
very friendly and happy place !!
April 9th, 2009 at 3:01 am
You won’t be the first English nor the last English teacher to be in Japan. There are thousands of foreign language teachers in Japan, not just Americans, and they all seem to do just fine in friends and relationships.
There are others who do not do fine, and leave after a little while.
It depends on you as a person and the people you meet.
That’s pretty much the same as life anywhere else.
April 10th, 2009 at 12:30 pm
It is much harder to start conversation with a stranger in Japan without seeming creepy so it is generally hard for foreigners to make friends. There are plenty of ways around this barrier. Here are ways to get around that/things to keep in mind
1 First off, learn Japanese. If you only speak English, people who want to learn English will be the only ones interested in you.
2 Live in a guesthouse that has Japanese and foreigners. Sometimes you won’t love the people but its exponentially easier to start conversation with someone you see every day.
3 Look into different areas, certain areas are known to be friendlier (particularly Osaka).
4 Just because they want to learn English doesn’t mean they won’t want to be your friend. I have made 3 or 4 friends out of language exchange and we usually speak more Japanese than English now. You will have to sift through a few boring people or people who are what you describe but it won’t take that long to find someone interesting.
5 Find a cool part of the city that you can relate to. If you are in Tokyo I can reccomend a few according to your taste. Stay out of roppongi. Seriouslly, not only is it half foreign, the japanese people there are lame.
6 Become a regular at a local cafe, younger resteraunt or bar. My friend who is much more outgoing than I has made a lot of friends this way. It is pretty rare to make friends with a waiter when you are a customer, even in America I think, but he manages to do it everywhere he goes haha.
7 Don’t play up what could be pinned as stereotypical, it attracts really foreign obsessed Japanese people who won’t look at you for who you are (or just want to learn english) and it scares away Japanese people who aren’t used to foreigners.
8 Respect culture, obviously, and try to get into it as much as you can. Its fun.
9 Don’t be afraid of the internet. I have met cool people on myspace, couchsurfing.com, italki and a few others. Just be careful and meet in a public place.
There are tons of cool people here and most people are foreigner-friendly, you just need to find a way around the cold exterior of city ettiquete.